I guess.. I’m really quite lost? I don’t know what to do, on one hand I wanna be selfish and want you all for myself, I get jealous just looking at pictures and … yea you get my drift. But on the other, I just wanna be supportive and be there for you in everything you do. Couldnt really sleep last night cause I was just thinking.. and thinking. Just hate the fact that I cant be with you 24/7, and I think I’m jealous that you’re so up there and I’m just.. a nobody. Can’t be the person I want to be and who you want me to be, though I’ve tried and tried.. I’m just afraid I’m not enough for you. On top of that, I guess, Im afraid that you won’t be able to say no? In the sense that rmb you told me that others’ opinions matter so much? What if one day they pressure you to do something you don’t like, or whatever, will you say no?
Im honestly happy for you, and I’m genuinely happy too.. just so many concerns that bug me till no end ): I guess I just need assurance.. That you can keep account to me, stay safe, push away any advances from other people although it might seem harmless.. and make time for me ):
ahh ok I know I just sound super unreasonable to you, and you probably dont like it but I dont either. Just.. dont mind me, and if you wanna, assure me again :/
RT tdy.. sucked. It’s not that I mind going for training on saturdays, rather, it was more slack than i expected. So a waste of time, well, not completely.
Super long journey home but thankfully my friend was there to talk, and a good one it was. Then rushed out to meet J (: slacked about at Starbucks for a bit then explored duxton area. Quite a nice place but food is too exp! But we found a nice chill place right smack in the middle, planning to go there during block leave (:
Ate at a jap restaurant which was okay, Miz I think-みず, then roamed around the nearby park and found a nice place to sit (: well, apart from the freaky altar. And the cute rat. Haha but spent a good time talking and sharing! Need to survive the week ahead sighh ;/